My last note, ended on a high one: book publishing. I didn’t go into detail about what’s been happening on this front since setting foot on Chinese soil. But I HAVE been going in and out of the ‘book world’, so to speak.
I left Ireland and my book has travelled with me, in both the literal as well as the figurative sense. I still find I’m going through a big change, when it comes to focussing on that part of my journey. Before arriving, I knew it would be different: because I once focussed maybe 70% of my time on the book (while I was in Ireland) and now it’s a mere… 10% maybe…
I’m teaching full-time now and I realize it’s taking a lot for me to continue focussing on publishing. I learnt in Ireland that finding your way through the book-world is almost a full-time job; it takes time and effort. But now, in my daily life, after a day of teaching, sometimes all I want is to chill-out and unwind… But that feels to me like stopping the process; because nothing actually gets done in the world, if action isn’t taken (such a simple truth!). As well I know I’m the only one who will give this book the much needed attention and I need to make an effort to stay in the “game”.
Have I been slacking? Honestly, I DON’T feel as if I have been. But now that life in China is unfolding, I sometimes find it uncomfortable that the book is taking on a different role in my daily life.
What I’m currently trying to pursue, can be compared to the following scenario: you’ve just landed yourself a new job, it’s one that you love and it needs your focus - so you grow and learn through the experience and do the best you can, each day. You’re feeling like the luckiest person on the planet. At the same time, you dream of attaining another position in the world; one you desperately NEED to own – all in aid of helping others: becoming a published writer. This scenario boils down to this: I’m “applying for another job” when I’m totally happy with the one I’ve got. How contradictive…
But then again, this is my dream. I want to have BOTH positions in life! Is this greed? Or simply a desire to experience the unlimited potential as I healthily savour all that I’ve done and all that I’m currently undertaking? My dream: Published and travelling (and teaching just so happens to be the job that’s suiting me down the ground, at this moment in time)…
Hummm… Let me think… Right… Yes… the answer is coming! I think I’ve got it! This life is what I’ve been creating all along! It’s everything I envisioned it to become, when I was writing my book, when I started to approach the agencies and when I first signed the contract to teach in China... Yes, this is everything I set-out to do, all at once!
So, the dream is merging?! Yes… I think so… Or… I KNOW so…! To be a writer is to always want and need the world as the source of inspiration. Yes! And that’s why I am where I am, right now. One book is complete and another will, one day soon, be written. And in between the 2 books; a person simply needs to work, to thrive, to experience, to live, to express and to create in different ways… This person is me! Yes yes yes! This is brilliant… And to live, means to write (in my world)… therefore I can trust that I am a writer at heart, who is getting published. Without writing, there simply is no life, not for me… And so I’ll always be surrounded and supported with everything I need, in order to pursue this dream, the life, this journey. Yes, so much is happening for my book, here in this Chinese world already… The next post tells all!!!!
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