On Sunday (the 27th) I got an email from an agent in Ireland. He’s the guy who I got in touch with, through the radio interview. Peter. He worked at a publishing house for 7 years and now is setting up his own literary agency in Dublin and is in search of manuscripts. I sent the first 50 pages, a month ago. And finally I got a reply at the weekend WITH PROPER FEEDBACK! Yes! I was so happy to read something other than: “You’re book isn’t for us” (which is the response most of the agencies have been giving me lately).
Peter actually told me his honest opinion and gave me some tips. Was it good and positive? There were mixed vibes coming from this email… He saw the potential, but also saw the work that still needs to be done. He suggested I either revisit my manuscript and tighten the story or seek a professional editor to help me with the process… Hummmm… Was I deflated? Was I disappointed to hear that my story isn’t publishable (in his eyes)… At first, of course it’s something I needed to digest… But I soon understood what he was saying and why he was saying it… I took a few moments… thinking, thinking and thinking… What to do? My first real feedback, telling me to edit the story (and reduce the word-count by 20% - making it more accessible to publishers and readers)… Hummm…
So the day after receiving this email – my birthday – I sat at the coffeehouse and suddenly I figured it out! I needed to do this editing myself BEFORE approaching a professional editor. Yes, this is what I needed to do… And to do this, I needed a place and environment that feels… settled. I need to be living in a place where I can totally focus on the story again, if I want to do this properly… Even though the current living situation offers me space, I still feel that I can’t sit down and dive into my story, without being distracted or being influenced by what’s going on around me…
Over the past weeks, I’ve been meaning to dive back into the script again (it’s something I haven’t done since finishing it in December). But I can’t seem to do it. In my free time I’m constantly distracted. It’s like I’m being pulled to the world outside the apartment, when really I should be taking a few hours to devote some much needed work and attention to the book. And because I want to, but can’t allow myself, I then feel guilty because it’s as if I’m neglecting something major…
Whaaaaaaaaaaaa… yes, so this has been happening. I can’t pinpoint what it is that’s so unsettling about the apartment in the Manhattan complex… But something is stopping me from writing and focusing. So… I’m going it alone! Regardless of how lucky I am to have Matt as a roomy and how clean and new and fresh this apartment is…
Before telling others, I let the idea sit with me for…. 2 days… Because then, as ever, the events around me were forcing me to start making it happen. I heard on Wednesday morning that the new Irish teacher Ricky would be moving into our apartment. That to me was such confirmation: Yes Niamh, you need to go it alone… Living with 2 men and a beautiful Australian Sheppard by the name of Cooper (Matts’ dog) would definitely be too much.
This decision is somewhat unexpected, but it’s the right one. I’m just getting my priorities in order… And at the moment, it’s editing my book, at any time of the day or night, outside of my working hours… This will be only one of the many good things that will come my way by choosing to live alone… As well, it will be first time IN MY WHOLE LIFE to have an apartment to myself! Finally… 28 years old and it’s happening… never thought it would be in China… of all places!
It will a few weeks before it’s sorted, which is nice too, because I’ll get to savour my last weeks of having roommates (it’s PLURAL from today… with Ricky arriving!). Keep you posted .
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