This update will be a little fuzzy and might not make much sense. But my writing always represents how my head is feeling, which can also be described as "fuzzy" at the moment.
Leaving Cairns. My last day in this city..and so far it's been crazy and long. I reckon it's about to get even longer. This morning, Saturday the 22nd of August, we were due to leave our little "ashram" in this tropical paradise. The contract was up in our share house and by 10am we were on the street.. Temporarily homeless..
With a little hangover, me and Janice parted this morning. She managed to get herself sorted out, when it came to finding a job too. On Thursday she finally decided that she'd be going to Ayr (which is a 7 hour drive from here), to work on a farm. There wouldn't be work straight away. But within a couple of weeks she should find herself picking fruit. We knew we'd be parting, once I had decided to go and work for Jason. And we knew it was time. I could feel that being in each others company for much longer, wouldn't have been good for either of us. We are too alike, when it comes to alot of things, which can be amazing but also hard work at the same time.
The first week after we met, we couldn't imagine not being in each others company, as we had gotten so close, so quickly. Back then, just the thought of us having to leave each other at some stage made me feel sick to my stomach. But that eased off, once we settled. So I knew that it would be best for us to part. At the time we met, it was for a purpose. We have helped each other so much over the past weeks, and have learned so many things that we wouldn't have learned if we had never met. Knowing this, we were excited to both move on and continue with our own individual journey. So it felt great when after 4 weeks of living together, we realized that our paths were only going to be passing for a certain amount of time. We were destined to meet, the way we did at the airport. And we're now moving on, in different directions, carrying each other in our hearts. With all this in mind, when it came to saying goodbye this morning, I wasn't too sad. I knew I'd feel that feeling again once she left: the glorious one of being totally independent again and on my own..even if it only is for a day, until I get back to Jason again.
Last night, before we went out for some drinks, I sat on the bed, in a clean room, with space and with my own thoughts as I contemplated the past 4 weeks. It was like I was seeing a summary of this whole experience, different clips from a movie, set in Cairns.. So hectic, but yet so peaceful: the talks and the parties, the tears and the laughter, the exploring and the learning, the sun and the lagoon, the music and the job search, the backpackers and the familiar faces. So much great memories..
So I was sitting on the bed and thought of how crazy it can be, the way circumstances lead towards certain situations and how we really never know how things will plan out. I don't regret that I didn't find work here and that my stay in Cairns is far shorter than I expected it to be. It's time to move on now, and the thoughts of working again, excites me. It's time for a different environment and different people. The partying is done now, for the next while. It will be strange not being in the sun anymore, not being able to go for a drink whenever I like, and not being a part of the busy world for the next while. It will take me a few days or a week even to come down off this high that I'm on and that I can easily get from meeting so many new and great people and from being apart of this busy and familiar environment.
Some of the people I'm talking about, are Irish Cora, Russian Micheal, French Alex, Australian Tristan.. They're all part of my Cairns experience. And by the familiar environment I mean the community that has become so so small: I'm suddenly starting to be recognized when I'm walking down the street on my own, by a passing stranger that asks me how my head is feeling after the big night I had last night as he supposedly spotted me on the dance floor somewhere.. Humm..
So at the moment, I'm waiting to leave Cairns. The past 3 nights have been random, unexpectedly long and so much fun. I've gotten the partying out of my system, but the effects I'm still feeling.. There hasn't been alot of sleeping unfortunately, and there won't be until tomorrow night. My flight is at 5.30am tomorrow morning and I'm bedless until I get to Shepparton tomorrow evening. Tonight I'll be sleeping at the airport. Until it's time to get the bus, I'll be filling this day with catching up with some guys we were hanging out with. I'm not feeling lost, but am eager to get going. The taxi to the airport will be at around midnight, and I'll be waiting patiently for quite a while for take-off. It's a whole day of traveling tomorrow, so I'll be pretty knackered by the time I get to where I'm going. Thankfully we're starting work on Tuesday, so that gives me Monday to rest. Can't wait.
So for now, I'm so grateful for what this beautiful city has given me.. And as one chapter is closing, another is opening.