The darkest days of winter are arriving and it’s really putting me in hibernation-mode. The fire’s lighting, the music’s playing, I’m snuggled in 2 dressing gowns, 2 pj’s, 4 pairs of ‘cosy socks’, fingerless gloves, and a blanket around me… just in case the cold STILL creeps in. I swore that this post WASN’T gonna be about the weather… So I’ll stop here…. After adding that I’ve now got 4 duvets on my bed (okay, the duvets aren’t the fluffy feathery extra warm type ones… but still… 4!!!!!!!!!!!!!!). Okay, that was my short little ‘cold rant’ for today (I could go on a little longer, but the more I focus on it, the colder it will feel!)
Regardless if it’s a challenge to keep myself warm in badly insulated cottage, I’m loving this time here, more and more. So grateful to be paradise :)
It was only during the week, I actually took the time to realize my surroundings. Of course I knew I was in a great place, but I didn’t fully open my eyes to see it; I’d been too stuck into other things, letting myself get away from the moment.
So, one morning here during the week, I went out to explore the area of land that belongs to the farm. It was the perfect morning as well; frosty with bright blue skies, the sun hanging low in the sky, but creating a warm glow. I wandered and explored, hoping to leave the stress I’d created throughout the morning, behind. It worked a treat.
Suddenly I found myself sitting on top of a fence, surrounded by fields, with the sun heating my face. Not a drop of rain (!), not a gust of wind… only the birds, the bees and beyond that, total silence. I sat, eyes closed. And in that moment, I actually STOPPED as a result of where I’d placed myself. I STOPPED the stress by embracing this place. And I became shocked at how my mind had been racing and racing up until that moment of sitting there on the fence soaking up the Irish late November sun. I realized just how powerful it is, to tear ourselves away from the worry, hassle, burdens and pressures we create ourselves, in our own minds, if we just take a moment to consciously connect with our surrounding environment. Wow… how asleep we can be, and how blinded we can become to the beauty that’s right here in front of our nose!
For this to have happened, was huge - even if it sounds so simple, even if it’s something I’ve experienced before. But when we temporarily loose sight of the light and beauty around us, it’s startling when that light and beauty does reappear… Wow… It had a powerful effect on that particular day, because, only before stepping out of the cottage 15 minutes prior to finding the fence, I was journaling, worrying, analyzing, trying to make sense of the chaos in my head (which had exploded during meditation). I was actually, in that moment of journaling, following the chain of my thoughts. It was like a map, and I saw, on paper, how my fears had escalated and brought me to the conclusion: ‘Niamh you need to leave this country!’
What the hell!!!!That came out of absolutely nowhere! It wasn’t until I was sitting on the fence, enjoying the sun, that I realized I’m EXACTLY where I want to be in this world, at this very moment! There’s nothing I don’t have, nothing I can’t create – be it another book, or simply a feeling of heat! I can create everything RIGHT HERE AND NOW… by simply coming into this moment, relishing in what I’ve got RIGHT NOW, without pushing to find answers as to WHY I’m pushing for a move around the planet! When it’s not even what I want… Not at this moment. Because what I have, and where I am, is all I need!
I sat, I sat, I sat… I could’ve been anywhere on earth and life was truly alive inside. I opened my eyes, to be greeted by a fox! This was a first! It was off in the distance, didn’t come close, but wow… so beautiful. After been given such a precious little moment, I was only getting started… I hopped off the fence, wandered down another pathway, stumbled upon an old well, walked through the woods, climbed over an old bridge that was hidden beneath the earth, trees and leaves… I then found myself sitting on a wooden log, still with the sun shining down on my face, looking out over another field, flat. Beautiful. Still.
A view of Athenry town off in the distance – where everyone is running, distracted and ‘stressed’… (well, at least compared to the sense of calm I was feeling in that moment) Just the thoughts of the traffic, the high school buzz, the few shops doing their business and the supermarket running non-stop… It was too much and it didn’t need to filter into this moment… How blessed I felt to not be a part of it and to just BE a part of REAL life… My gaze fell over those low fields of Athenry! The song really DOES tell the truth: the fields they lie so low! I’ve witnessed it now. And it creates a feeling of grounding and home; without ever needing to push for things to happen or for miracles to appear. Because they are right here. All we must do is open our eyes.
I continued to wander onwards through the woods, looking at the earth, covered in brown leaves, crunching beneath my feet, looking up at the sky, beyond the leafless trees, the birds flying overhead. Amazing so close to nature. I then found the lake and again, wow… Those still waters have been there all along! 4 min from the place where I rest my racing head each night! The voice inside became louder… names of famous authors came to mind, their style of writing, their wisdom, their dedication. Then I was reminded of remarks I’ve made in the past whilst speaking with inspiring people regarding my path in life.
There, I stood, observing the lake, listing to the flowing river just behind me, relating to my inner voice so clearly and I knew that I was making everything work. Inspiration, clarity, creative juices. I knew and felt that I’d have the power to balance everything in life, without letting things slip through my fingers. And if things do so happen to slip, yet if those things are meant to be, then they'll always come back. Nothing is ever lost. This is something a person only realizes when they suddenly find themselves, once again and again and again… over and over… The journey never ends. Wow.
With that I went back to my little cottage, a blissful hour had passed, the fire was lighting. It was 1pm, time for lunch, time for writing, time to be creative. And oh yes, how it’s flowing!