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Wednesday, May 27, 2009


The time has come and it's the day I'm due to leave. I can't quite believe it. It's Wednesday afternoon and I'm packing my backpack, I'm gathering all my bits and pieces, I'm throwing out stuff that is only weighing me down and I'm preparing for the off. I'm not stressed, but slightly groggy from the wine I had last night, as we went for a few drinkies in Brisbane. I'm also excited, I'm just about ready and I'm a tiny bit nervous.

So where am I going and what am I doing..?? I'll start at the beginning..
When I first arrived in Oz, on my second day, I got a phone call from Jason. A dear dear friend of mine from Adelaide, who I worked with in Nyah West on the farm when I was here first time round. We were so close as friends and he has proven to be more special than I initially thought. Why? Because he proved to me over the past year that any friendship can withstand the distance of space and time, especially when one needs as much support as possible, whilst being in a dark place.

When we last said goodbye, it was December 2006 and I didn't know if I'd ever see him again. We both went our separate ways and lost contact until Summer 2008. When I had just got back to Ireland in June last year, I wasn't doing too well. But one day I suddenly found myself thinking of him and I wanted to seek contact. I looked up my old sim-card, found his old mobile number and thought I could at least see if he still has the same number. I sent him a text, and within minutes I got one back.. It was so surreal. He didn't know what my story was at that point in my life, so I decided to write him a letter. I wanted, for some strange reason, him to know what was going on with me. And once he had received the letter, he supported me so much by texting me kind sweet words every week, without fail.

Those texts were always the highlight of my week, they made me smile even it was for just a short while. But it was still reassuring to be aware that I was still able to smile back then. When I was in the midst of everything last Summer, (I don't even remember sending that particular text) I sent him a text saying that once I'm better and back on my feet again, we would definitely meet. I forgot I had sent that text, but left it in my phone, only to read it months and months later after I had made the decision to come back to Oz. And after I was already aware that he was one of the reasons I needed to return. I wanted to come back and he was probably the catalyst or the drive that made me see where it was I needed to be, or maybe I wanted to see him again because of all the support he gave me. Either way, I was shocked when I came across that text, to read that I was already so willing to see him again, even whilst being so muddled.

When he rang me, on my second day in Oz, he was talking about doing a roadtrip in a van. He was planning on going pretty soon. At that moment, I'd had a glass of wine, so I was feeling a bit courageous and I asked him if he wanted some company. He was delighted, and so was I. It was too much of a coincidence that we were both in a position to travel at the same time, to not act on it. From that day, I've been waiting for everything to fall into place. He was finishing up the work on the farm, waiting for his last payday and waiting to buy the van in which we would be traveling. Then he was going back to Adelaide (which is where he lives) to sort out some stuff. Because he was doing so much else, I was wary about getting my hopes up too much. So I kept it pretty much to myself. But once he got everything sorted, he texted me, which was last week Monday, saying that I had to be in Adelaide by next Thursday (which is tomorrow) so we can go traveling! And that's exactly what's happening..

I booked my flight on Sunday, I'm flying from Brisbane to Adelaide this evening, he will be picking me up from the airport and we'll be starting the roadtrip from there. Straight away apparently. I can't quite believe that it's all fallen into place, the way it has done. It seems so surreal. I haven't seen him for 2 1/2 years. And tonight I'll be seeing him again. Who would have thought that it would happen so soon.. I never did. When I booked the flight over to Oz, it wasn't my plan to meet him this way, I didn't really have a plan. I told myself to keep an open mind about everything, even when it came to meeting Jason. It didn't matter when we were to be meeting or under which circumstances. I wanted it to happen but wasn't going to expect it to. And certainly not like this, not so soon and not so easily..

We'll be traveling in a van that he has renovated on the inside. It was empty when he first bought it, so he's now equipped it will all "mod-cons". He'll be doing all the driving, as I don't have a licence. We're starting from tonight, heading up to Cairns, driving cross-country. The usual route to Cairns would be via the coastline, which would give you the chance to see all the touristy spots and do the partying with all the backpackers. But, nope, that's not our plan. Driving cross-country means that we'll be driving through hundreds of miles of dessert.. for days and days. Once we get to Cairns (which some people reckon will take up to 3 weeks.. but I'm an optimist and I'm convinced it won't take us that long), we'll be heading over to Darwin. This is another route that would usually only be driven by the insane..or those who like to get off the beaten track. It will be hundreds of miles of more nothingness and dessert. But beautiful nothingness.. From there we'll be heading straight down the middle of the country, stopping in Uluru. That's the most famous spot of Oz. It's the big red rock, that is on the front of nearly every travelguide of Australia. That will be amazing.. From there, we head back down to Adelaide.

All this, in 4 weeks.. It's nearly 10.000km.. Is it doable? I reckon so. Or more to the point, Jason reckons so. I guess I'll have to take his word for it. All of these places that we'll be visiting, except for Darwin, are new to me. I haven't been to Adelaide, Cairns, north Queensland, Uluru.. So that just makes it all the more exciting. What an amazing trip!!

So new adventures are ahead. The first part of my trip is coming to an end. I'm leaving, after being here in Caboolture for 4 weeks. I've had an amazing time. It's been chilled-out as well as fun. It's been a great place to get my bearings and to settle into Ozzie life, which happened so easily that I sometimes can't even imagine I was never here to begin with. I've met some great great people and spent time with close family. That made it into such a great environment. The one thing that did strike me, was how I feel like I've been here so long, and how I've settled so easily and how this can make it more difficult to get up and just simply go.. But it's happening and the timing couldn't have been better.

After meeting such great people here, I can't say that I won't want to come back here to visit. Because I do. Oz might be a big country but it's relatively small and it's so easy to make an effort to revisit a place that has become so friendly and familiar. Or come to think of it, it isn't even an effort because doing something you want to do, is usually effortless..
So bring on the new times, I'm ready for whatever this trip might bring. And I'll continue to say that I can't quite believe this is happening..

Sunday, May 24, 2009

Intoxicated I was..

Out and about in Brisbane city. Another quiet night, or that was the initial plan. Not that a plan had been made, so nothing was expected and therefore without any expectations a few hours can end up going in so many different directions.

I can laugh about it now and it doesn't really bother me. On the night I was told I'd be able to laugh about it, rather than cry as I did on Friday night. How silly I was and what an exaggerated reaction. So personal I took it, but so impersonal it was meant to be.

Thursday and Friday I spent in the city. The weather was so much better than the days before. It was dry again and mild. So there was nothing stopping me from getting on the train and heading off for a while. Both days were so cool. I hung out, walked, talked, drank, played pool, shopped and all was well. On Friday night, as I was still out and about with Manny, Johnnie and Keryn, we ended up going to a nightclub that had whole load of different halls with live music, pool tables, dance floors and pubs. We wanted to play some pool and weren't going to make it a big night.. Humm; those oh so familiar and so very famous last words..

We had been drinking from around 6 and I had only had 4 glasses of wine, by 10 o'clock. Nothing excessive.. Right? Well, in my eyes, it wasn't. But in others it somehow seemed to be. At around this time, we were still playing pool and probably getting very loud. We were playing with some other guys we had just met, who were also on their way to getting pretty drunk. We seemed to get caught up in the buzz, the excitement of winning and the happy times.. Me being me, I got louder and louder without realizing it. Because of the environment we were in, looking back, we probably were annoying and seeming to have had far to drink than was actually the case (which makes the whole thing seem so unfair). So taking this into consideration I now can see the reason as to why the bouncers suddenly came up to us and told the blokes we had just met that they had to leave because they were drunk and then turn to me and say that I was the next one to leave..

I couldn't believe it, I was being kicked-out of this nightclub for being too happy and too loud and basically too excited by everything!! The 3 others, weren't being told to leave. It was only me. My first reaction was that they were joking..but they weren't when they still pointed so arrogantly at me telling me I was intoxicated! That's the word these 2 bouncers were using! I hadn't done anything wrong.. What were they talking about? Why me? I was shocked and took this so personally. The others tried to reason with the bouncers saying that I was fine, I wasn't drunk and I wasn't causing any problems, while I cried my eyes out in the toilet. I wanted to just stay locked in the toilet and let it all blow over. But they were waiting for me and were still adamant that I was intoxicated. All I could do was leave. It was so early, the night was still so young and I was still in party-mode, but they were having none of it. I couldn't speak anymore, so I just walked out of there feeling attacked and totally confused. I hadn't smashed up the place, I hadn't abused anybody, I hadn't broken any glasses. I was just enjoying myself.

I left and the others came after me. I was so upset and looking back my reaction might suggest I was tipsy. But wasn't every person in that nightclub tipsy?? As I had stormed off in tears, I couldn't speak and I felt so awful. "Intoxicated, intoxicated, intoxicated.." Was I really that bad? Was I really a disturbance? Was I in denial that I probably was intoxicated after having 4 glasses of wine..? If I was so intoxicated how come I can still recall everything that happened? I can even remember the bouncers and that old fashioned curly moustache from the oldest guy and that blond hair from the youngest. I can still recall how numb I felt, as I stood against the wall outside. That's the only word I could use to describe how I felt.

A normal person probably would have laughed it off, especially after hearing the word intoxicated being used to describe the state of being, and they would have more than likely just start singing Britney Spears song.. "intoxicate me now.. ". But not me, oh no, I make a huge drama out of it. In the meantime Manny was sticking up for me, talking to the bouncers and at one point the manager. They said it was nothing personal but that they could see what was happening, they had been watching me. They also said that if I'm sober tomorrow I could come back(!!), there's no worries, I wasn't barred but for now I was just intoxicated. All Manny could say was "But we're all bloody intoxicated.. the whole lot of us!!" How sweet of him, even if he was or wasn't intoxicated like me, to make a stand.. :)

I was still feeling numb and couldn't speak. I had to go home. I had changed so dramatically, from feeling up to feeling down. Manny, Keryn and Johnnie were so great. Really they were. They said all the right things as we went to another pub for a short while. We sat out in the rain outside, I had a coke and it was then that I was told I'd be able to laugh about it. I stayed in Keryns that night and when we got back to her house, after a great train journey home, all was forgotten and we had an unexpected pajama party. We all got into a pair of jimjams (as the ozzies would call them), we had sweets and crisps, danced the macarena and drank TEA and COFFEE.. So another "Up" after feeling down. How great it all was in the end, and sure enough yesterday as we were telling the story to Trish, we all laughed about it..even me.

Saturday, May 23, 2009

It's raining, it's pouring

It's Wednesday afternoon - The heavens opened on Monday and I actually thought they were never going to close. I've experienced rain before and have been in plenty of storms. But I've never been in a house for such a length of time, without being about to venture out because of the consistent rain. It was horrendous. It started Monday evening and stopped this afternoon at around 1o'clock. Much to everyone's relief.

The first night it started, I had never heard anything like it. I couldn't sleep for the noise of it and had nightmares about storms, floods and accidents. The whole day yesterday, it continued and right the way through the night. I really thought the rain was neverending. I thought that was it.. forever.. No more sun, no more dryness. Just clouds and the sound of the raindrops on the roof, with flood warnings on the news, for the south eastern region of Queensland. I've always known that Queensland is classed as the tropics (just like the Northern Territory, and parts of Western Australia), and that it therefore doesn't rain that often. But on those odd occasions when it does rain, it POURS!! Now I've finally come to experience what rain in the tropics really is. In Thailand I had experienced torrential rainfall, as I was there in the monsoon-season, but it was only for short periods at a time. Here though, it just didn't want to stop.

All that rain, the sight and the sound, started to make me feel slightly enclosed and claustrophobic. Not that I suffer from claustrophobia.. But I could easily have done, given the circumstances. It was probably down the fact that there was just no way I could get out and about, when I wanted it most. We were all so restless, pacing up and down, not being able to sit, not being able to go about a day the way we normally would do and waiting for it to ease off.. The weatherforcast said that it was to still be heavy, until the weekend. And hearing that, you're thinking to yourself..well, there goes any chance of making of the most out of my last week here with Trish. So restricted in doing anything.. But then a miracle happened and it stopped! No more raindrops, no more noise, no more floods.. (for now that is, it could still turn around). It started to brighten up and slowly patches of blue started to appear in the sky and all was calm again. Hallelujah!!

That's when I went for a walk. Seeing as though there was still more rain to come, I knew this was my chance to just get out in the fresh air, for only a short while, even if it was just to make the most of the sun that was shining. It was still warm and the air was nice and humid, not cold or sticky or windy. As I walked along, everywhere was covered in huge poodles, miniature rivers and the excess water was gushing underground. I could even hear it. But it was so calm and everywhere seemed so much greener. I was stopped in my tracks by a road just around the corner, that was flooded. It seemed so unfortunate to see what the rainfall had done and the extent of the damage it can cause, especially knowing that there are other parts of the region that have been more badly effected than we have been. For a moment, I had forgotten where I was and what I doing, when I started to remember the first time I walked down that same road, 3 weeks ago - which feels like a lifetime ago - and the feeling of content freedom I had for being here, in Queensland Australia. I felt sad for having suddenly lost sight of where I was, when I turned around and there I saw the first kangaroos in the wild, since arriving here nearly a month ago. I was just so happy. It was like a wake-up call to me.. "Niamh..don't forget to never stop appreciating where you are and what you're doing, even if it is just that walk I'm taking or the kangaroos I'm seeing or the country I'm experiencing or the people I'm meeting or the freedom I'm having". As I walked on further down the road, there were a few more. They were so close, so calm, just standing there, looking at me, posing for the camera as I tried to capture them whilst being so tame in their wild surroundings. It totally made my day. The sun was in my face and everything was able to breathe, I was able to breathe again. The air, the ground, the animals, the people..

The so so familiar saying "after rain comes sunshine".. (or something like that) is so so true. The sun is always there, it never lets us down, it's always waiting patiently to soak up the rain and in some cases to go a little bit too far and to dry out the fallen rain too much. But it's just a relief to know, even if the rain does pick-up again this evening, that it will always shine again. They are still giving flood warnings for the region, it's on the national news too. So many accidents have happened, homes destroyed and creeks breaking their banks. But hopefully, for once, the weatherman has gotten it WRONG.. and the rain will hold off and the dry relief can be appreciated..

Monday, May 18, 2009

The eye of the tiger

Friday afternoon, heading in to Brisbane. Into the city, where it all happens, and where craziness is easily a messy state.. Especially when you're heading off with 2 lads from Cork and an Ozzie girl, who could easily pass as being Irish, when considering how much she loves going mental. I don't really know what we were planning and had no idea how big of a night it was going to be. Little did I know that it was the start of the wackiest weekend I've had in a long time.

We, Manny, Keryn, Jonnie and me went for drinks on Southbank, and met up with some of Keryns other mates. We started pretty early, so by 8 o'clock it felt like the middle of the night. There are too many details and I remember them all, but am not going to put them into words right here, but there's just one particular thing that needs some extra attention..

The place we were drinking at, was beside a market. It was all in full swing when Keryn came up after flying from one spot to another, all excited telling everyone that Manny has bought a tiger.. A tiger? What are ya talking about? A real one? How? What? And most importantly..Why?? Why would somebody buy a tiger?? Well, it turned out that it of course wasn't a real tiger and that it really wasn't a crazy thing to be doing, on a random Friday night as the beer was flowing so freely. It's pretty normal, considering the happiness we were all feeling. And when we were introduced to this beast of a teddy, we knew why Manny had gone to the trouble of buying him..

But the size of this tiger, kind of made it a challenge, when it came to getting ourselves back on the train once it was time to head to Keryns' place in Burpengary (the weirdest name I know, I reckon somewhere in the history of this place a person let a massive burp and his name could possibly have been Gary..), at around 11pm, too full of laughter to keep ourselves contained.

The four of us had been drinking for some hours, so yeah, there was a little buzz coming from either Pure Blonde, Carlton Draught or Champagne.. We walked through the city, at this early hour, with the tiger on our backs. To be honest it was actually Johnnie who took it upon himself to carry the tiger, who Manny ended up christening Roger by the way.

The train journey was one of the best I've ever had in my life. And I'm not even exaggerating. I've been on many tipsy train rides before, but this one journey is up there with the best. And it was all down to Roger, or maybe just down to Manny who wanted to buy Roger in the first place.. Either way, we welcomed Roger into our night of happiness. We brought him to Mac Donalds. We fed him burgers, we introduced him to strangers. We sat on his back, we danced with him, we made jokes with him. And he loved the attention. We could see how he was growing because of it.

Can you imagine.. 4 people and an overgrown stuffed teddy, making their way home whilst being surrounded by sober people and not having one ounce of shame, laughing their heads off and treating good old Roger like a real animal. The whole train was loving Roger. Some people even wanted us to take photo's of them with Roger, some people actually came from the adjoining carriages just to have a look at Roger. Sober people were actually petting him and totally in awe of this tiger. This could have been Rogers night to finally become famous.. And all we could do was laugh. It was just the funniest thing ever.

We went to where Gary had let a Burp somewhere in the history of this place, and the after party continued. It was just so funny. I don't know till what time we were up, but that didn't matter. Poor Roger was pretty tired though, after the long journey home. The next morning, Saturday, and for the rest of the day and night - as we unexpectedly kept the party going at Keryns place whilst having drunk so much the night before that all I needed was water and the alcohol was reactivated, then to abduct Trish, fire up a barbie and eventually get on the drink again - we couldn't get over that train journey home. We were still in fits just thinking about it and we all agreed that it was the best train ride ever..

Good old Roger was pretty quiet though, so we entertained ourselves until the sun came up. Manny then started to feel a little bit guilty for not paying that much attention to Roger, so he took him for walkies over the fence in the back garden, at 7 o'clock on Sunday morning. And by that stage we were so reluctant to get some sleep, that I wanted to head to the city again. But I was put to bed even though in my mind it was only 2 o'clock Saturday night. A short few hours later, waking up and simply not being able to not wanting to start again. It was time to head home, to Trish's house. We needed to be on safer ground again. That back garden in Keryn's house is such a dangerous place to be. Just like last weekend.. once you get stuck there, you just don't wanna leave. If it was because of missing Roger or because of the great company, who knows, but we had to leave and resist temptation..

So Sunday was a hazy day, as you can imagine. It was like I'd skipped a few days of my life and stepped into this zone for a while and didn't step out of it and land back on earth until waking up on Monday morning. What a weekend.. but I miss Roger..xxx

Thursday, May 14, 2009

A different kind of travel

As I sit and think and ponder about my next step, I can't help feeling like I'm not doing enough. It comes from both myself and from others who I've traveled with, or others who travel. Me and them, or all of us, are so eager to experience and read about my adventures.We are all so willing for me to be the same as I was when I was here first time round. We might even want me to be approaching this journey with the same attitude as I did when I was here 2 years ago. But it's not the same, it simply can't be.

I have so much I want and need to say, but I can't. This blog is different from my last. I set it up, with a different reason. Everyone who is tuned into this blog, also followed my first blog. So it's common knowledge what my last one was about. The contents of the 2 blogs were worlds apart. Not only in space and time, but also in mind and spirit. This blog is "supposed" to look at the world differently. It's "supposed" to look at me differently. It's "supposed" to experience life differently. But maybe it's all not as different as I'm willing to admit. The person who is writing this is still the same person who wrote the last blog. It's still the same girl who wants to always get the most out of life. It's the same girl who experienced every detail that was described in the last blog. It's also still the same girl who was in Oz, 2 years ago. This girl is the same, but not really. This girl is different, but still the same.

Is everyone waiting for me to get a move on, and start this adventure? Or am I just waiting for me to get myself into gear and explode with glee for being able to go and be and experience everything I want? To me, the adventure has already started. Or it's just still continuing as it was my first blog that contained an adventure of a lifetime and this one is the same, but lighthearted and easy, compared to what I was first going through. I want to travel like I did 2 years ago, or maybe I just feel I have to travel like I did 2 years ago and it's not for the need of wanting to. Am I just seeing what others are seeing, and therefore feeling pressured into acting accordingly? Am I truly eager to get going or have I changed in such a way that the tiniest little things in life are enough to make feel like I'm living my dream? Or maybe I haven't changed at all and I will still want more and more as I travel around and will never be satisfied? I might even loose sight of how amazing it is that I've made it to Oz?

This time in Oz, can never be the same as it was when I was here 2 years ago. I've changed in such a way that time is no longer of the essence. There was a reason for me coming back here and it wasn't to get drunk.. Okay, if it happens, it happens and I still love to part and have fun and dance and meet new people. But my attitude and my way of thinking isn't like it was back then. I don't want it to be, because I know how I paid for it. Others who DON'T know the ins and outs of my past year, would expect me to be like I was back then. Others who DO know the ins and outs of my past year, would probably expect me to be even more driven to go absolutely bonkers now that I'm back in this brilliant country and have the energy and the freedom to do whatever I want.

Am I trying to live up to what others expect of me or am I trying to live up to what I expect of myself? Am I truly willing to go crazy or am I truly able to go crazy and therefore shocked that I'm not yet doing so? I can't be quite sure. But what I am sure of is that I'm excited for what's to come. I'm excited to get moving again and that's not taking any expectations from travel buddies or buddies in general, into account. It feels so natural for me to not feel or be or travel the way I did the first time I was here. Is there a rush? Not at all. Is there pressure? Maybe from myself, but it's because of what I feel I should be doing instead of what I truly want to do.

I don't want to travel the way I did the first time I was here. I was to appreciate every step of this journey. I want to embrace the fact that I made it here, to begin with. Instead of getting stressed out about what to do and where to go and how quick can I see as much of the country that I haven't yet seen. A question such as: "I'm eager to know if your second year in oz will be different from your first year" just gets to me. Especially coming from someone who knows how different I look at life right now. It can never be the same.

Just because I've started this new blog, doesn't mean that the past year didn't happen. Just because I'm here, doesn't mean that all my others emotions and issues are forgotten. Yes, I've dealt with them, and when they come up, I'll deal with them again. But it has still had a profound effect on my approach towards life. I might be here on a working holiday visa. But I'm not really classing myself as a backpacker. I might have a backpack, but that's it. I will be working at some stage in the near future, for short periods of time and moving from one spot to another, like I did before. But it's not the same, it can't be the same.

I know where these thoughts of me not doing enough are coming from. They are just old habits that are dying hard. As I already said, I'm still taking different steps that will help me in feeling more settled within myself after being through a rough year. So I'm adjusting. That's the reason why I'm feeling like I should be doing so much more. Soon I will actually not feel the need, but I'll also want to. Because there are 2 things that I'm currently working towards and hoping they will actually happen. If they don't, I have other plans. If they do, then this life is the more amazing than I thought.

I'm here in Oz to finish what I started. That's exactly how I feel. I feel like I've been given a second chance to experience Oz. So do I feel the adrenaline of being in a new country? I don't really have that. I feel more blessed than anything else. I felt that same feeling the first time too, but then I felt the pressure was on, to do and go and see and experience everything. Now there's no pressure. I know what I want to aim for and I don't feel like I'm on a timeframe, even though my visa in only for a year. That might be why I sometimes feel like I'm not doing enough. The things I'm aiming for, are the things that are close to my heart. Whatever else comes along, is only a bonus, be it good or bad, or right or wrong. So time will tell if what I really want to happen, will come in to being or not. Time will tell.. there's no stress and there's no pressure. So all is well and good. I just have to be aware of the reasons as to why I'm doing what I'm doing..

Tuesday, May 12, 2009


After the weekend, either losing focus or losing sleep. But that’s okay because I have all the time in the world, or in Australia, to catch-up on all of that. That’s all there is to do. I’m here now just over 2 weeks and it feels like so much longer. Is this good or bad? I reckon it’s a good thing. It means that I settled so quickly and easily into this life. And that’s always a good thing. I don’t really think back to my time in Ireland too much. When I do, it’s only to feel reassured that I am where I want to be. However reassurance isn’t something I need. So I don’t have to look back therefore when I do it might simply be because I can’t get my around the difference between how I felt in one place and how I feel right here.

I don’t miss Ireland, only certain people. I don’t miss Holland, only certain people. It’s only normal to miss the people and it comes with being away from home. But I don’t really feel like I’m away from home. Isn’t that only a feeling you have when you have a life to go back to? I don’t feel I do. There’s nothing in this world that’s pulling me back to what I once did or once had, how ever selfish that might sound. There are only the adventures that lie ahead that are pulling me towards them. There’s nowhere else I’d rather be, than on this journey.

I don’t know when exactly I’m going to be heading where I’m supposed to be heading. But just to be on the road, even though I’m staying with Trish for now, is where I want and need to be. I’m settled in one spot for a short time. But it doesn’t feel bad. It only makes me want to aim for the next step. The one that will make me feel unsettled. Then I’m being challenged and can work on feeling settled again until I want and need to unsettle myself once more. I can feel at ease so easily in one place but just as easily and quickly I can feel uneasy in another place. It’s seeking a different environment, a different outlook, a different life based on short-term encounters with certain people, situations and events. It opens the eyes so briefly again with all the impressions that are so rich and so alive. Even if they are impressions that aren’t being seen for the first time, they can still feel like they are as it’s either been so long or they were so dearly missed.

I’ll go anywhere and do anything. That’s what I want and what I need. It’s like thrill seeking, because that’s all there is. I feel so blessed for being able to seek that thrill, that adventure, that uncertainty. I feel so rich because of it. I can revel in that fact, but only for so long. Once that has settled, the next step needs to be taken. I’m working on that step for the moment. Exactly how, what and when, I can’t say just yet. But as soon as I have a little bit more certainty, you will be the first to know.

Two BBQ's

The weekend has been and gone. It’s Monday morning and we’re all getting back on track. On what track? I don’t really know. The track that involves only non-alcoholic drinks? The track that unravels this journey? The track only to reveal that life in Oz, so far, revolves around sitting and just being? Or maybe all of these combined..

The past week has gone by so fast. It’s all been really great. Saturday was a great day. It started off pretty early, as we were going to see Keryn, Manny and Johnnie (friends of Trishs’ who were here last weekend too) jumping out of a plane! It was Keryns 30th birthday party so that was her way of celebrating, a long with the party she was throwing that evening. They were doing the skydive, around 20 minutes from here and landing on the beach. I was so excited for them. It was a clear blue sky and the sea was gorgeous.. They couldn’t have had a better day for it. We were actually later than expected, so we missed them jumping. But we hung out anyhow and saw a bunch of others landing on the beach. Oh my god.. I soooo wanted to be them!! I was so excited just for seeing them jump.. I want to toooo!!!! I’ve done it before, and would do it again at the drop of a hat. But it wasn’t my time to go for it again. Seeing it though, did get the old adrenaline pumping, I have to say. There’s nothing like that feeling of jumping out of a plane.. So amazing, so thrilling, so courageous. I was so pleased for them..

Keryn was getting the party started in the afternoon. We didn’t get to her house until dinnertime.. Or bbq time should I say. It was a mad house party and felt so “homely”. I used to always go to similar parties when I was working in the pub, here 2 years ago. And I always missed having nights like that, so much. But Saturday I had one of the those nights again. There were so many great people, so many Ozzies (yeah!!!) and so much fun times. We had a bbq, we played games, we chatted, we laughed, we drank. Me and Trish didn’t really want it to end. So we stayed up till last and had a sleepover too. The next morning I felt like I haven’t felt in ages. I had the foggiest head yet I still high from having such a great night. I walked downstairs.. And guess what? It was bbq-time .. again! Of all the ones I’ve had, I’ve never had one for breakfast. With a beer - the “Hair of the dog”. What dog? I hear you ask. Well, the one that caused the headache that morning and the one the was also the reason for the night before to be so crazy. Now, I have to say that even without the dogs, the party would have been great. But when certain dogs lead others astray, then there’s simply no reason to fight it temptation.

Just the one beer was all I could stomach. I tried to go for the second but it “had bones in it”.. (I’ve never heard of that expression before but apparently it’s a beer that doesn’t really taste as good as it should do.. but hey-ho.. I gave it my best shot, and I wasn‘t the one who put the bones in the beer so I couldn‘t help it). It turned into a 24 hour session.. For the boys it might have been, but I wasn’t sessioning due to the bones..

So today, we’re all back on track. Life is good and the sun is shining. The nights can be cold but the days are still lovely. I still wake up and feel so happy to be here. I still love to stop and realize just how happy I am to be here. If day-to-day life doesn’t make me, then this blog will.. It will continue to remind me of where I am and what I’m doing..

Monday, May 11, 2009

So wealthy

Feeling incredibly rich as this life is finally being seen
However it’s nothing materialistic, neither is it a dream
A wealth that’s so new, with nothing to disguise
Finally knowing that being here, was so very wise
Being able to be sure that this is all good and right
Makes the eyes flicker at the future that’s so bright
Inside so much richness, as nothing is out of bounds
Outside so many options, with exciting new grounds

One million amazing sights that float around this head
It gives such a rush of energy, with a bright color red
The redness of Australia or the redness of this soul
Combine the two and come up with 4, now you’re on a role
Never would you have known how wealthy one can feel
With a life so full of lightness because of this lucky deal
But it’s a deal that’s not down to luck, but life as it’s meant to be
For now nothing else matters, only the sight that you can see

A day spent in this life of yours, with no reason to set a frown
It’s a change from constantly wishing you didn’t feel so down
Suddenly, naturally, spontaneously, forcefully or controlled
In whatever manner it occurred, it’s worth it’s weight in gold
One morning waking up and realizing, this is really it
Nothing more to dwell on, now you’re feeling so fit
It wasn’t until you were free from that place and frame of mind
That you can now switch-on to the world, that will treat you kind

If you let it, the world will turn out to be whatever you desire
Starting small but dreaming so big, as you reach higher and higher
As there’s no one to stop it happening, there’s no one to hold you back
Not when you feel that there’s nothing within you that you lack
As you think of what could be or what should come your way
What you’re hoping and aiming for, is more than you can say
It only took on small choice for the next one to come about
With being so excited yet calm, there simply is never a doubt

The disbelief of what you experienced, will always be there
However it’s never a reason to shy away or to easily scare
It has already given you a feeling you’ve never felt before
It’s the one you can’t describe as well as the one you can’t ignore
What a gift you have been given and it will continue to remain
Now you finally can experience that life will never again be the same
A world so amazing offering everything you want and need
You can finally feel guilt-free for taking, as you can live and breathe..

Tuesday, May 5, 2009

Ozzie times

It’s Sunday afternoon and for the first time since arriving here, it actually feels like the day it actually is. That’s probably because I was up much later than usual this morning (10am), which was such a nice treat. I think I’ve now finally conquered my jetlag. A whole week of falling asleep and being tired at random times, has payed-off. Hallelujah!! I’ve adjusted to Ozzie time!! The best feeling ever.

Ozzie time was what I always wanted to live by. Back in Ireland I would often feel like I was chasing time because Australia was so many hours ahead of us. I was Always wanting to catch up with the Australian time and always wanting to be one of the first people to experience the new day, before the rest of the world.. This was something I remember being the best feeling ever, when I was here on my first trip; Getting a head start with waking up and going to sleep, with going to work and with going to party. Isn’t it strange that time can have such an influence and do so much, when really it’s not at all important that others are awake on the other side of the world, while you are sleeping, and visa-versa.. I don’t really know why it meant so much to me or why it still continues to do so. It just simply does.. So to now be on their time and not to be knackered anymore, is amazing!!

Actually, so many things are amazing. I’ve been here now for a week. And it still can’t get over it. I could go on and on about how much I love it here, but I’m not going to. Instead I’ll tell you why.. My feet are bare and breathing!! They are out of hibernation, as are my legs and my freckles (slowly but surely..). That’s my reason for loving it here, today. Each day I could think of something different. Another reason, is that we had a great night last night. Trish arranged a Barbie, which was my first one in a year and a half. It was bril! Some mates of hers came round, 2 Irish lads, Manni and johnnie and an Ozzie girl, Keryn. Sarah was there too and Trish proved to be a whizz with the smoking hot deliciously smelling coals. We sat for hours and hours, eating, drinking, chatting and laughing. It turned out to be a 12 hour session. Such lovely people they are..

It’s real typical Irish: Being so glad to leave Ireland and then getting to oz, and who are the first people you get acquainted with over a pint? The Irish.. Isn’t it crazy really. But the thing is, you’re guaranteed a laugh and that’s what you want. And these guys more than lived up to what the Irish are best known for.. So what more could you want? It was so much fun and I couldn’t quite believe that I was sitting in Trish’s back garden, having a barbie.. something I had wanted to do for ages and it was happening. For everyone else it’s so normal and it’s their way of life, but I’m still so excited for being here that everything is amazing.. Even the simplicity of socializing with people I only just met..

So this morning, slightly groggy of course, I needed a little boost.. And what better way to start the day than taking a dip in the pool!! It was freezing (the water) but it was gorgeous at the same time. Nobody else dared get in, especially not the Ozzie's.. I was called insane for getting in.. Not that that matters.. So the weather is still pretty nice, it’s around 25 degrees during the day. We’ve had some clouds, but even they are amazing.. They look so different from the clouds back home. They’re so high up, so vast and so clear for some reason (could be because the atmosphere is thinner). You can actually see them rolling in and rolling out and changing with every breeze or gust of wind, especially if the land is flat with the horizon in sight. And clouds or rain is always good because it makes the sunny days even more glorious. So you won’t hear me complaining..