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THE FREEDOM TO CREATE BRINGS US THE FREEDOM TO LIVE



Monday, November 12, 2012

Question time



Today I realized that this whole set-up – cottage in the west of Ireland, tea in the pot, fire at night, snuggly in a blanket – is actually something I envisioned myself to be experiencing, in around 20 or 30 years’ time! Wouw… I must be old before my time! Not to worry... I know this is only temporary. I know there's a time for coming, a time for stationing and a time for moving again. And now, is my time to be stationed.

I’ve only been here just over a week, and already it feels like a whole lot longer. The space feels to change every day, depending on what I’m doing or how much time I spend here. So much happens, but I can’t exactly say what! I have moments when I think… ‘oh god, what have I let myself in for…’ Putting myself in a cottage, so alone and only connecting with people if I consciously go out and make the effort. But then I have moments when I’m so excited by how much work I can get done here. In my moments of panic I have to realize that this is the only situation that would reveal what needs to be unveiled and I couldn’t have chosen any other direction, other than this. This is exactly what I wished for. And I got it. For now, I’m still adjusting and settling. I’m still trying this… (even if it's a trial for 6 months). I can't know yet if it’s actually what I want. But I guess it’s what I need otherwise it wouldn’t have come to me so easily?! 

As well it’s like, for so long, we can want something so badly. We do what we can to make it happen, we wait patiently and we trust that it’s on its way. And then when it suddenly appears and we make it happen… It suddenly becomes the ultimate test to see if what we wished for really is the thing we want and if we have what it takes to make it work out for us. It will be interesting to see if I can actually do this; staying here by myself, without too much isolation and still working on writing a book and promoting the first.

Oh, just touching the subject of the book… The best thing happened the other day. I was in Galway city, had a few bits and pieces to sort out. I randomly walked into the Dubray bookstore on Shop street (the main street in the city centre). I thought I’d check out the genre Irish Biography. And wouw… there it was… 2 copies of Digesting Wisdom right beside a very well-known Irish author Martha Long. Yay! What a cool moment that was. It’s actually the first time for me to walk into a store and to see it on the shelves! Woopdidoo!!!!!!!!!!! 

To stay on the topic of the book. I keep hearing myself saying: 'I’m working on promoting the book'. But what am I actually doing? Well… give me a minute… hummm… Ah yes… At the moment promotion involves contacting quite a few organizations that are focused on eating disorder treatment. As well I'm  networking with some therapists and a few authors, offering them my story for reading and further recommendation. We’re starting to organize a few signings too! The first one is set on the 1st of December in Arklow! Brilliant… And in relation to that, we’re getting the advertisements sorted. I think so far, we’ve contacted every radio station in the country to see if they’ll let me on for an interview. But to be honest, only a tiny fraction has replied... Ouch! So that’s proving a little difficult.

On a whole, it’s quite a slow process. And I – unrealistically – expected for it to be something that would take off without any effort whatsoever. Oops… Ah well, not to worry. I guess this all a part of learning. Because I’m only a novice, a beginner, so new to this business. It helps that I'm starting to be more patient and more trusting that the media channels we’re trying to get to open up to us, will soon start working with us, so the book will reach those who need it. 

In the past I've read articles from authors, sharing their experiences with publishing. Some say that the writing of the book is the hardest part. I’m not too sure about that… Because this step in the publishing journey, is quite tough. And because of this, it’s also quite hard to sit back, relax and savour the fact that the book is in print and that the hard work I put in, whilst I was writing it, is already paying off... Because there’s still work to be done… On certain moments I wonder WHAT exactly. Because I’ve no real idea what could come my way, or what direction I actually WANT to steer this is in. Maybe I’ve spent far too much time waiting for something to happen and now it’s time for me to stand up MAKE things happen for myself. And maybe this space and the time I now have is all in aid of that… 

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