A temporary home has been found

A week in Cairns..and what a week it's been. Sometimes I can't quite believe my luck. So much has happened, and it's all so so good. On my last update, I had just met Cora and Janice. It was our first day together, we had only just met each other, and were obviously still finding our feet. The 3 of us were so excited, and were already so keen to get things sorted here in Cairns, that on Thursday, we randomly came across a number of an agency that deals with housesharing. Housesharing can be compared to living in studentaccommodation. We were so certain that we wanted to be in Cairns, find and job and settle for a while, that when we rang the number and were told to come round to the office to check out what rooms were available, we didn't have to think twice. Just like we didn't have to think twice, when we they offered us a twinroom, in an apartment with 6 other girls. The rates were cheaper than staying in hostels, we'd have a clean house, we'd have privacy... what more could we ask for? The rooms were available from Saturday, so we grabbed our chance.. Our chance to stay in a place as beautiful and lively as Cairns. Me and Janice instantly clicked, so I didn't doubt that living with her was all I wanted. So, within an hour of ringing the number, we had a home!! I couldn't believe it.. I was only in Cairns 24 hours and already I had a base for at least the next 4 weeks (we had to commit to staying in the apartment for that length of time, which wasn't an issue for me), and I was sure to be sharing a room with an amazing girl...

We couldn't believe all that was happening. So much, in no time at all.. We had 2 more nights at the hostel, before moving house. We had an absolute ball; living the hostel life to the max, and not caring about anything, because I knew that it was only temporary. We partied a little, and talked a lot. Cora, the Irish girl who we met at the airport too, was staying in the hostel for another week, before moving into a share house too. Everything was falling into place and being around backpackers again, after being with Jason for 2 months, wasn't any hassle at all. Their all drunken English and Irish girls and boys all over the place, so I was able to fit in well with it all, and not be too annoyed, all because of the move that was going to take place on Saturday.

Saturday was our day.. We got to the house, and the space was enormous.. Especially after living out of a van, with no space at all.. It was amazing. So what is the set-up like? It's like no where I've ever stayed before in my life. It's around a 15 minute walk from the Esplanade and the lagoon (a free man-made lake (with sand and everything) open to the public everyday of the year), and from where everything happens.. We have everything in this apartment.. luxuries I'd forgotten that existed: a sitting area, a big kitchen (where nobody steals the food). We have 6 other girls who we share with. They are all around 20 years old, and students. They are all so quiet, and it's all so clean.. We even have a cleaner!! We have a tv.. WITH TV CHANNELS!! (I must have sounded like a right wolly..or a proper bushman..when I asked if the tv has channels..my god..what's happened to me!!). We have a wardrobe and I actually unpacked my backpack (I put it under the bed, and was so excited, because I knew the next time I take it out and use it again, is when I'll be moving on after having lived another chapter of this journey, and I'll be so much richer with different experiences and new people in my life..how excited I was).. We have a desk in our room. We have clean sheets, we have a bedside table!! We even have a pool and a bbq area in the garden, which we share with 3 other apartments in the same complex.. We have palm trees in our garden, we have a dinner table, we have a clean fridge that will keep our fruit and veg fresh, that we get from the huge market that takes place 3 times a week and where everything is "cheap as chips".

There was so much to take in on Saturday, that it was overwhelming. But at the same time, as I sat at the dinner table that night writing, it felt like I'd been there forever. It felt like home straight away. Going from a van, to a set-up like this, is huge.. But all so natural at the same time. Me and Janice are like I don't know what. Every night, if we aren't out, we're up talking for hours, whispering to each other in the dark, giggling like little girls and then falling asleep and feeling so high on life.. This is the feeling I got on Saturday and Sunday night when I went to sleep, in my brand spanking new bed, with the clean sheets and a proper duvet.. It was amazing.

On Sunday we were settling in even more and by Monday afternoon, as we went to visit Cora in the hostel and drank wine from 3pm onwards before going to a bbq on the Esplanade and meeting other travelers, we were referring to the apartment as our home.. What an amazing feeling it was.

Today is another day, a day to maybe start the search for a job.. The next thing that I'm eager to sort. Seeing as it's raining (tropical rain I might add, the kind that feels sticky, and makes the air smell like it's a summers day.. because it always is..and it's delicious!!), I'm gonna sit here and sort it out. There isn't really that much around at the moment, when it comes to work, but where there's a will, there's a way. There simply is no question about it.. Because I'm here now, I have a home, and work is what I need if I wanna keep on living the dream. But even without work, the dream won't end, because the dream is my life. Also being around Janice I'm being reminded of my dream and it's been reawakened, if it might have temporarily gone to sleep. Not that I feel it did go to sleep, but being around someone who has the exact same dreams as me gives them, and therefore me, the energy I was might have been seeking. It's amazing. I love this city, I love this life, I love this day..

A miracle.. if ever there was one

Wednesday Morning, the 22nd of July. I got on a plane, I left Jason and flew to Cairns. In some ways it felt wrong, as I turned and walked through passport control. But in other ways it also felt freeing. My emotions were so mixed, that I can't give them just one name.

As I walked away, I instantly had to take on a different approach towards everything.. Suddenly there was no one there anymore to talk to, or to listen to, or to ask about where we should go or what we should do. Every single decision I was going to make, from that moment on, was my own. This is a feeling of being so free that I felt, when I said goodbye at Dublin airport 3 months ago, even though I knew I was going to see Trish and Wayne on the otherside in Brisbane. I also felt it, when I said goodbye to Trish and Wayne at Brisbane airport, even though I knew I was going to see Jason on the other end. I felt it when I first set off, 5 years ago, when I said goodbye to Emma and Orla at Schiphol Airport, when I was going to London for 3 months on my very first big adventure. So it was a familiar feeling.. And yesterday it was there again. It's a feeling that gives me confidence, that tells me anything is possible. It's even a feeling that makes me want to walk taller and I instantly feel stronger. It makes me feel like there's nothing else in the world, except me and the unknown. I was totally dependent on myself once again, after so so long..

Getting on that plane, first to Melbourne (where I had a short stop-over), was a risk. I was taking a chance, taking a leap of faith. However I had to let go of the feeling that this next step could possibly be the wrong decision. If I were to hold on to that, I could easily end-up living according to those feelings. It took alot for me to accept the freedom in this uncertainty and leave the fear behind. I knew I had to feel fine with what the unknown gives me and the opportunities that can arise from it. The journey was 5 hours in total. I was nervous and excited, and sad, all at the same time. When I got on the plane in Melbourne, I spotted a girl with short hair, and she stroke me as being French. She had a very distinctive look about her and I instantly knew she was traveling. My seat number was 22f. A window seat.. I was delighted. Once I settled in my seat, this short-haired girl sat beside me. We didn't chat, and I was still convinced she was French.. I had no intentions of chatting to her. I was too busy sorting out my head..

The flight was 3.5 hours. Beautiful scenery, and I was writing lots and lots..all to get to that place of not fearing what I was going to encounter once setting foot back in Cairns. It was going to be so different without Jason. I didn't know if I'd miss him even more, by being reminded of where we went together and the great experiences we had. I didn't have a hostel booked either. I didn't know what I was doing. I didn't have a plan. All I knew was that, whatever happens, happens.. I also knew for sure that I would have time to focus on me and on what it is I want and need to do next in this beautiful life. I wrote so much, that I can't recall exactly what I put into words, but one thing did stick with me and that was that I was so excited as to who I was going to meet..

Towards the end of the flight, the girl next to me, starting chatting away. She ended up being Irish (the plane was pretty noisy, so that might have been the reason why I thought she was French..huummmm), and she was traveling and, just like me, she had no clue what she was doing or where she was staying. Not reading too much into this coincidence, we got off the plane and went our separate ways.. I had no intentions of trying to tag along with her. I was feeling fine with going into the city alone. I picked up my luggage and walked up to this information board, that had lots of different phone numbers displayed of the hostels around the city. I walked up, and stared.. What was I going to do? Then the Irish girl did the exact same.. she walked up and stared. Then another girl did the exact same.. she walked up and stared.. So here we were.. 3 girls, staring at the same information board, finding ourselves in the exact same situation.. We were traveling alone, we had just gotten off the same flight from Melbourne, we didn't know where to go in the city, but more importantly, we were all so excited about being in this beautiful place..

We started chatting and chatting and before we knew what was happening, we had booked ourselves into a hostel, in a room with just the 3 of us and it was like we had known each other for ages. We got to the hostel, which is around 5 minutes from the city center, and chatted more and more.. We were like old buddies. Their names are Cora (27, from Galway) and Janice (31, from Malta) and I'm blessed to have met them. It became apparent that the 3 of us had the exact same feelings, when we boarded that flight, earlier on that morning. We all had visions, and maybe even concerns, about getting to a hostel infested with pissed, noisy and immature teenagers. all partying up and down the east coast of oz. We all had visions of being alone and feeling lost (because we all had just left some special people behind) and feared that we would regret the decision we made in coming to Cairns. We had such a laugh when we admitted that we really didn't want to be the typical backpacking "pissheads" anymore. The 3 of us were so over it..

Cora and Janice are really really special. We chatted until I don't know what hour last night and have definitely met for a reason. We spoke about why we booked that particular flight, what reasons there were and how blessed we are that we all stood at the same information board at the exact same time. We wouldn't have met otherwise. Me and Janice are both on the same wavelength. We connected instantly and I'm so so eager to get to know even more about her. I know we'll both learn so much from each other. It excites me so much.

I went to sleep last night, feeling like I was walking on air. Why? Because I couldn't believe my luck. I think the 3 of us felt the same. I woke up this morning, and felt like I was on holidays.. Even though I'm in a place that holds alot of memories I share with Jason, I was still so eager to get out and start this new chapter, this new adventure. I wasn't worried about feeling lost without Jason. Cairns looks different right now. I already felt it yesterday, when I sat in the hostel. I woke up and was eager to start the day, and to get to know these 2 great girls even more. It's so exciting and we seem to be at the exact same place.

Not even 24 hours ago, I didn't know of their existence. Now I feel I know them well, especially Janice, and I don't want to have to say goodbye to her just yet. This was destiny. I'm 100% certain of it.. It's almost a miracle and I'm already feeling privileged to have met them, especially Janice..

So I now sit at the computer, in the heart of Cairns. It's a beautiful day and I'm so excited. Yesterday was a massive day, and now it's settling and the opportunities that have arisen, since getting here, I feel are huge. There's so much going on right now, that it's hard to keep up with my yearnings and my enthusiasm to start making great things happen for me. We still will never know what will happen next, but life can be so miraculous. It might all sound very far fetched, but it's just how it is right now..

I'll be staying in the same hostel for another few days, I can't say what I'll be doing next, but I'll be sure to keep you posted.

Cape Tribulation - Beach heaven

From Palm Cove, the place just north of Cairns where we settled so easily, we headed up further north. We made a few stops along the way, in touristy places such as Port Douglas, which was really overrated and far too expensive, after stopping at nearly every beach we found that was deserted and white.. It was all so beautiful and the scenery got greener and the weather got warmer the further up we headed.

That first night, after leaving Palm Cove, we parked in a dirt road to camp for the night as we were trying to hide from any rangers (or as we call them at home, the police) that would be lurking about, on the proul for tourists breaking the law when it comes to setting up camp illegally (which is nearly everywhere up here in North Queensland). They never got us though! We camped near Newell beach. But didn't realize just how close we were to the beach, until we woke up the next morning to find the sand only 20 meters down the track. It was the most amazing thing! It was so unexpected, but absolutely brilliant. We ended up hanging out for hours, doing yoga on the beach, Jason was swimming with the chance of encountering a croc.. All very exciting. Well, he thought so, I was just acting like a concerned nanny, nagging and being worried..

We had to head onwards and upwards still, and entered the rainforest. It was the Daintree National Park, that leads up to Cape Tribulation. We had to take a ferry across the Daintree river. Well, when I say ferry, I actually mean that it was more aof a plank on water, that holds 21 vehicles and takes all of about 2 minutes and costs 20 dollars! I was appalled.. (there was the nagging me coming out again..) But as soon as we drove off the ferry it was like entering a whole different world. A small, green, tropical world, or community even, of which we were took part. It was one road with lots of walking tracks and beaches and rivers and creeks, all in this wonderful rainforest. We didn't manage to camp for free, seeing as though we were in a national park, so we had to book a night on a campsite. It was right next to the beach again, so we, once again, had found another spot where we so easily could have stayed for ages. We hadn't really planned to stay for 3 days, but that's how it turned out. We realized as soon as we were due to leave the rainforest on day 2, that we weren't done with this special place just yet. We were actually sad at the thoughts of having to move on. But then we thought: hang on.. who says we have to leave??. We were on no tight schedule and if we wanted to stay, we could and we did.. Then that song of Phil Collins came to mind and we continued to sing it for the rest of the day.. "Oh, think twice, it's just another day for you and me in paradise.." Which it was. I have to add that everyday in this life is really a paradise, if that's what you want anyhow. Just being alive can be classed as paradise, no matter how hard things get. It's all a blessing..(sorry, getting slightly sidetracked).

Anyhow, they were amazing days (Can't even remember the dates, I think it was around the 17th to the 19th of June). We got up each morning, 3 days in a row, and stepping on to the beach, going for walks, doing yoga and sitting by the shore in the eveings, stargazing and keeping a look out for crocs. This brought us up to last Friday (the 19th). It was time for us to leave the forest and the rain behind. These short days we spent there were so great. We didn't think that after having the best camping experience in Palm Cove that we find such a place again, but we did. And it was equally beautiful.