To continue my book rant...
The impatient me seems to think: I’ve done this once before, so I’ll do it again, faster, easier and so much better! Hummm… The art of patience needs to be put to good use here! This notion does get me thinking though: Am I setting myself up for a fall if I put so much pressure on myself to create faster and with less deviation, less obstacles and with more power? Or is this pressure a good motivator that I can use when overcoming such obstacles as, for example, failing to feel a flow or loosing sight of what direction this book is heading in?
Some more pondering: If I expect this writing to be a difficult and slow process, then is that what it will be? On the other hand, if I expect this process to be flowing and without a doubt a story that needs to be shared, especially after the first book, then will it be a revealing, satisfying and amazing journey once again with the end result being an expression of myself, that hopefully complements the first story I’ve written? If I hold on to the intentions I have BEHIND writing this next book then will that keep me going? Also, I wonder if it’s ‘wise’ to be talking about this next book so much. I’ve been advised before that if you’re working on something big in your life, don’t talk about it with others, because that puts expectations on yourself and pressure for an end result to be visible. Which I suppose is only a normal reaction. So what I’m doing right here, on this blog… (talking about what I’m trying to create) is this right or wrong? That all depends on how I let the feeling of pressure from outside of myself, effect what I’m doing.
The best thing I can do is use the pressure as a motivator to keep going. Because I can’t NOT share what’s going on in my life! Nope. It’s what I’ve become accustomed to doing and therefore I’ll continue to do it. I remember to have had these same doubts before: whether or not to talk and share what’s happening with the book. But now I believe strongly that the talking and sharing of the journey towards making something happen, does actually MAKE IT HAPPEN. There’s also a saying that goes: ‘What we talk and think about, we bring about’.
I guess, everything we do in life, can feel risky and daunting. And that’s what I’m facing right now. To overcome this, I can use my experiences of the past as reassurance that whatever I believe I need to be doing, will always be the right thing and so I can never fail.
Going back to yesterday; I decided to review what I’d written the day before. And then something happened… Yes! The doors opened up and the concept came flooding through. The story was suddenly clear enough for me to keep typing. I can’t see the book as a whole. And that’s impossible to envision, not until it complete. But I see the next steps and it’s exciting.
This is what I mean when I say: ‘I’m home alone, which is when most things happen’, because yesterday nobody was at home, and the ‘whole thing’ became clear. I’ll see what happens over the next week… and I’ll continue to share it!