I rang home, on Monday night. And I can definitely say that I feel closer to them. The distance is getting less, in time and space. Not only this, but also parts of this city remind of me of parts of other cities, such as Amsterdam, Bruges, London and Paris. But there’s something far deeper here that is making me feel amazed. Is it the contrast between Indian chaos and Italian civilization? But civilization is encountered everywhere in the Western world. So what is it about this particular city? Is it the level of appreciation visitors have towards what it offers and the way the locals embrace the life of such a city?
This is definitely showing me such a different world! Indians don’t appreciate the beauty of what they have. They couldn’t care less about what they are doing, or not doing, to actually express any kind of gratitude for the environment in which they live in. I’m only generalizing now, because there are exceptions of course, and those exceptions are encountered in the higher classes of society. But in general they couldn’t care about the world around them. And that’s what I’m experiencing here; they do care! What a contrast.. But then, this just confirms that a civilized country or city gives more value to material things as they strive to have their surroundings in perfect order. And in India they value a deeper kind of life and it’s nothing to do with order in their surroundings. This is one of the many differences between a material and non-material world.
Having said that, it doesn’t make me want to run from the civilized world back to an uncivilized one - not just yet anyhow - even though the thing I learnt most from India is that a deeper way of living, can fulfil a person totally. It’s all about balance though. At the moment, I’m breathing freely because of the sense of not having to practise caution in the physical world. I don’t have to get frustrated. I don’t have to mentally prepare myself for the challenges I may encounter “out there” in the world. I can be free in the sense that I’m the observer of a new world. I can participate, play the role and take from this world all of the realizations I can. It’s simply relishing in the “luck” I feel, to have been born into this European culture, which will give me everything in both the physical and non-physical sense I need so I can live as I wish. We are all blessed to be born into this particular world and should use the freedom it offers, to our advantage, if we feel the urge to do so.
I feel to have made the right decision in stepping away from an Asian country for now. It’s what I needed. I don’t know for how long it will feel to be the right environment for me. But for now, I’m trying to take each day as it comes. I’m trying to hold myself back almost when it comes to thinking ahead. I’m inclined to get carried away in the excitement and I‘m getting the strong urge to “sort out my life” all within the space of a day by finding a job, booking more flights and setting some sort of plan into action. But it doesn’t work in the space of day. I don’t know where I’ll want to be, within the next few days. But my priorities will start to guide me, once I get over the jetlag and regain the energy to follow those urges I have to do what I need and can.
I can’t believe my luck sometimes. I’ve landed myself, once again, in a loving home, in a magical city and am being looked after without being smothered at all! They don’t even want to know for how long I’ll be staying, that’s how open and free this whole situation is. So I can embrace it and see where it will lead me.